” That also helps steer the conversation away from a too-intimate discussion of your relationship history or the ins and outs of insemination… That’s what happened to Lisa, now the mom of a toddler. “The men who already have children are very interested and respectful of what I’m doing, even offering to go on doctor visits,” she says.
’” Other women in this situation say they set it up with something along the lines of: “There’s one big thing going on in my life I should tell you about.
When it comes to intimacy, honesty is key, if you want the relationship to have long-term potential.
No man wants to have the double-whammy surprise of being told his new girlfriend is pregnant—and Women aren’t the only ones putting their long-term reproductive goals ahead of whatever possibilities a new relationship might hold, points out Lori, 43, who’s five months pregnant as a single mom.
I’ve always wanted kids, and the clock is ticking, so I’ve actually started trying to get pregnant with a sperm donor. But it’s the kind of thing I feel like need to be upfront about with anyone I start to date.” Then, to give your date the opportunity to talk about the topic in a less personal way, you can segue into a current-events conversation by adding, “It’s starting to be a bit of a trend these days. That’s great you’re doing it if you want that,’” she says.
Do you know anyone who is thinking about starting a family in this way? “One guy just thought it was cool and cheered me on. Neither turned out to be long-term relationship material, but my trying to conceive wasn’t the deal-breaker.” Other men hit the road immediately, however. “Then you never hear from him again.” Martie finds that her dates’ reactions depend on their parental status.
I had been telling him a goofy story about acupuncture, and he asked why I was doing it.